WELLS FARGO'S GROSS INCOMPETENCE WORKED OUT IN MY FAVOUR

I got another two-week continuance.

janedoe@seductive.com 

INGLEWOOD, CALIFORNIA IS TRENDING ON FACEBOOK

That's where they made all those black and white educational films during the 60's. Sid Davis fucked me up for life.

Right now it's warmer in the UK than it is in DC.

HAVE A HAPPY MEMORIAL DAY!

Or not. It's a free country. And yes, I realize people died so we could be free and I am grateful for that. But now it's so easy to offend people. If you wish them happy Memorial Day they say it's not supposed to be a happy day because we're remembering dead people. And if we thank LIVING people (veterans) for their service they say "that's what Veterans' Day is for." 

GREGG ALLMAN DEAD AT 69

That whole family's screwed up: http://heavy.com/entertainment/2017/05/gregg-allman-children-child-family-sons-daughter-elijah-blue-devon-delilah-michael 

ZBIGNIEW BRZEZINSKI DIED

He was a guest on the Bohannon show. People compared him to Woody Woodpecker. 

janedoe@seductive.com

OMG, OMG, OMG!

The Pittsburgh Penguins beat the Ottawa Senators 3-2 in double over time to take the Eastern Conference Championship and advance to the Stanley Cup finals. Just as I was about to retire my Pens T.

I LOVE THIS SONG

It has a haunting quality to it like Zager and Evans’ In the Year 2525.

janedoe@seductive.com

ROGER MOORE DIED

I remember him as The Saint--Mom used to watch it. Mad Magazine referred to his "urbane sophistication. 

AT LEAST 19 DEAD, 50 HURT AT ARIANA GRANDE CONCERT IN ENGLAND

See http://www.cnn.com/2017/05/22/europe/manchester-arena-incident/index.html

I was first heard this on Telemundo and was only halfway listening--I heard Manchester and thought it was something about soccer. 

 janedoe@seductive.com

"PEOPLE ARE TOO FAT ANYWAY"

Peg Bracken

Three articles on what Peg Bracken did for modern women without carrying a sign or burning a bra:

http://www.chicagonow.com/armchair-cook/2015/07/why-peg-brackens-classic-i-hate-to-cook-cookbook-is-still-relevant-today

http://www.stltoday.com/lifestyles/food-and-cooking/i-hate-to-cook-book-still-funny-after-years/article_721a7f16-e0eb-566e-9824-4f874a2733d3.html

http://pictorial.jezebel.com/the-woman-who-became-a-celebrity-in-1960s-america-by-ha-1794954388

TRUMP FARTS

POSSIBLE MEASLES EXPOSURE IN PRINCE GEORGES COUNTY

See http://www.wusa9.com/news/local/maryland/potential-measles-exposure-in-prince-georges-co/441504513

Failed my A+ Certification Exam by 50 Points

janedoe@seductive.com

I don't have hepatitis.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

Possibly week, month, year, etc: 

"You got some weird-assed shit going on."

janedoe@seductive.com

G-D IS SO GOOD

Apparently the Wells Fargo Attorney got tired of hanging around so I don't have to be in court again until the 31st <

Happy Mother's Day!

STABBING IN THE VAN NESS METRO STATION

Good thing I took a cab: http://wjla.com/news/local/police-investigation-at-van-ness-metro-station-red-line-single-tracking    

Two Spanish words I learned at the clinic--muestra and pañal.

M ASKED ME IF I HAD EVER TRIED FENUGREEK.

Or flax seed. I forget which country he comes from but he is always telling me what kinds of natural crap people over there take. Never mind their life expectancy is about eleven or twelve years less than ours. I told him all the fenugreek and flax seed in the world are not gonna get me a new job, a raise or a promotion, help me save my condo, cure strep throat or hepatits or solve Mom's or my other medical issues.

janedoe@seductive.com 

HUH

I must ride the five percent that never work. Kind of like the comedian who said "98 percent of the people are for Hitler. The problem is, I keep running into the other two percent."

Pittsburgh Penguins beat the Washington Capitals 2-0

I GOT CHILLS

But not the kind Travolta is singing about. 

SAW THE CARDIOLOGIST

It was also 14 years ago today I adopted my beloved Pippin. 

janedoe@seductive.com

NOVENA TO OUR LADY UNDOER OF KNOTS

See http://www.theholyrosary.org/maryundoerknots

PERDUE FOODS IS RECALLING MORE THAN A TON OF ITS CHICKEN SAUSAGE PRODUCTS

See https://www.fsis.usda.gov/wps/portal/fsis/topics/recalls-and-public-health-alerts/recall-case-archive/archive/2017/recall-045-2017-release 

EMMANUEL MACRON HAS WON THE 2017 FRENCH PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION

Merde. 

Always Dreaming is the winner of the 2017 Kentucky Derby.

Feliz Cinco De Mayo!

janedoe@seductive.com

QUOTE OF THE DAY

"Autocorrect is my worst enema." That after I accused someone of ducking me over. 

SAW MY PRIMARY CARE

Everything is okay except liver enzymes. I don't drink during Lent and I was to busy/sick to drink much after Lent so that is probably not the reason. More likely either the anti-inflammatories or the beating my body and brain have taken in the last three months. 

janedoe@seductive.com

A CHINESE WOMAN SITTING NEXT TO ME IN THE OFFICE OF TAX AND REVENUE ASKED IF I COULD TEACH HER SOMETHING

I taught her Laurel is the name of a woman, a tree, a city in Maryland, and a city in Delaware. Virginia is much bigger than Maryland and Texas is a very big state.

Happy May Day!

janedoe@seductive.com