Wednesday, December 31, 2014

"And so the old years...

...fraught with memories, die, one after another, and the new years, bright with hopes, are born to take their places"

Kate Douglas Wiggin

janedoe@seductive.com

Irritable Owl Syndrome



janedoe@seductive.com

Chief Engineer told me the automation barfed

That's novel.

THIS IS NOT NORMAL

See http://crimefeed.com/2014/12/woman-smears-poop

janedoe@seductive.com

THE SEVENTH DAY OF CHRISTMAS

I t really bugs me that some people take down their decorations/stop playing Christmas music December 26th. The Christmas season goes on until the Epiphany: http://catholicexchange.com/catholics-keep-your-trees-up

I like the idea of a 12th Night celebration, then beginning Carnival. When I lived in Germany I found it exhausting, not having a break between Christmas and Lent. Now I miss it.

janedoe@seductive.com

MY TATTOO AT 6+ MONTHS


janedoe@seductive.com

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

THE THEORY OF EVERYTHING

Did the Jewish thing for Christmas (Chinese and a movie). Saw the Theory of Everything. Not bad, but didn't live up to the trailer: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Salz7uGp72c

Still, I liked the line "however bad life may seem, while there is life, there's hope." 


Unfortunately I thought of the Friends episode in which Phoebe gets upset because she watched Pride of the Yankees and the main character got Lou Gehrig's Disease: http://www.friends-tv.org/zz220.html

TEN YEARS AGO....

...one of my favourite shows ever debuted. Here is a clip: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hEnZ80AQ__I

And another: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7PhWshI_yN4

Monday, December 29, 2014

THAT WAS THE YEAR THAT WAS

For those of you who are on Facebook, here's my year in review if you haven't seen it: https://www.facebook.com/snipercatcher/posts/10205734626589964?pnref=story

While this year was better than the last two, I can see how the idea was a slap in the face for other people: http://www.ibtimes.com/facebook-apology-year-review-app-sparks-debate-about-privileged-brogrammers-need-1768690

and http://www.ibtimes.com/facebook-apology-year-review-app-sparks-debate-about-privileged-brogrammers-need-1768690

SAW THE PODIATRIST

Surgery on both feet will be possible, but it means at least 12 weeks of being on crutches/wearing a boot. On the bright side, I have not gained weight over the holidays and may have even lost a little.

janedoe@seductive.com

WARM AND FUZZY

The diner in Adams Morgan is collecting stuff to keep people warm--socks, gloves, blankets, sleeping bags etc. See http://www.dinerdc.comhttps://www.facebook.com/DinerDC and https://twitter.com/dinerdc

janedoe@seductive.com

PARTY LIKE IT'S....

...whatever. There are still tickets available: http://www.meetup.com/20sand30sgroup/events/216365542

Sunday, December 28, 2014

Happy Birthday, Baby

My beautiful Patapsco is three years old today. Darling, I wish I could do better by you and Pepino.

Saturday, December 27, 2014

In Memoriam

My cousin Joe Savko died of cancer this morning. Although the Redskins are playing tomorrow, I am wearing my Steelers shirt in his memory.

WHAT'S WRONG WITH ADAMS MORGAN

R put it well when he said "it used to be people came here to get fun fucked up. Now they come here and get mean fucked up."

More than halfway through a 13-day run. Pretty tired.

Tuesday, December 23, 2014

DAMN!

Six hours after confession I took the name of the lord in vain.

Today is Festivus

The airing of the grievances: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R60z_7vZ0YI

Went to confession

Managed to not address the guy next to me at Starbucks as "dickhead."

Saturday, December 20, 2014

Mailed all my packages

THE SWEET SOUNDS OF THE SEASON:

The cough of a small child in a crowded post office.

They should have a sign out front saying "abandon hope all ye who enter here."

Wer die Wahl hat, hat die Qual

Being Jewish again this Christmas. Two things are definite:

1) Work
2) Chinese

But what else? A walk in the Botanical Garden? Volunteer work? A movie? (most of them suck) Other?

FUDGE

Breakfast of champions.

Fucking weird oatmeal flavours.

“I hope the exit is joyful and i hope never to return.”

Frida Kahlo

I wouldn't say I hoped that, but I DO hope when I die people will miss me and if they are relieved it is because my pain/suffering are over and not that they're relieved about not having to deal with me anymore.

And not to sound preachy, but while you and other people are still alive, make an effort to visit them, make the phone call, send the e-mail etc.

Thursday, December 18, 2014

The sweetest gift

Sometimes the greatest generic winter holiday gift you can give someone is to keep you mouth shut and/or not be a bitch.

I forgot

I should have started the novena to the Infant of Prague yesterday: http://www.2heartsnetwork.org/prague.htm

Wednesday, December 17, 2014

I have little regard...

For people who have trouble with anything more complicated than Green Eggs and Ham. Or the Cat in the Hat for that matter.

Janedoe@catholicexchange.com

Friday, December 12, 2014

Bringin' in the Funk

Kind of in a funk after a REALLY busy couple days.

Thursday, December 11, 2014

Two for Two

Saw Imitation Game tonight: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5CjKEFb-sM

Saw Disney’s Hero 6 yesterday: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z3biFxZIJOQ


Was prepared to hate both as I got into both free and usually that means the movie will suck, but was pleasantly surprised and would recommend either. 

Monday, December 08, 2014

Sunday, December 07, 2014

NEVER FORGET

Seventy-three years ago today the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor. My mom says it was snowing. In Pennsylvania, that is, not Hawaii.

It is also the second Sunday of Advent, but I forgot that. 

Saturday, December 06, 2014

A ROLLING STONE GATHERS NO NEWS

Okay that’s not exactly it, but as Kelly Bundy said, the mind wobbles. Last month the magazine ran an article about the alleged gang rape of a University of Virginia freshman. The event took place three weeks before the robbery. Now it turns out there are a number of inaccuracies in her story: 

This is opening up new wounds for me. Or old ones. 

Thursday, December 04, 2014

YOU SAY YOU WANT A REVOLUTION? THE SEVEN-DAY ITCH: A MITEY PROBLEM

Pepino has been diagnosed with mites. Vet treated him with Revolution and he is on Sulfamethoxazole for two weeks. I feel like an unfit pet owner.

Wednesday, December 03, 2014

HUMP DAY

After Black Friday, Small Business Saturday, Cyber Monday and Giving Tuesday.


janedoe@seductive.com

Saturday, November 29, 2014

SMALL BUSINESS SATURDAY

Today is Small Business Saturday. I try to support small business all year 'round, but sometimes it's easier said than done.

Friday, November 28, 2014

BLACK FRIDAY

Go out and buy stuff so people will spend more money, and I will get a raise or a new job and not lose my condo.

janedoe@seductive.com 

Thursday, November 27, 2014

The winter holidays

Tonight begin the "Winter Holidays," which for me begin Thanksgiving night. Although I'm wondering if they should actually begin on Halloween. It seems the time between Halloween and Thanksgiving gets shorter and shorter. This year Chanukah ends on Christmas Eve.

For me the holidays end Valentine's Day, Mardi Gras or Chinese New Year, whichever comes last.

It's Official

The winter holidays have begun. It wouldn't be Christmas without this little gem: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MgIwLeASnkw

SOMEHOW I FIND THIS FUNNY


THANKSGIVING

Happy Thanksgiving!


Monday, November 24, 2014

PROTESTS IN FERGUSON

Hearing about pepper spray brings back bad memories.

janedoe@seductive.com

IT'S MONDAY

I am in school and just felt like sharing a picture of some cute pigs:



janedoe@seductive.com 

Sunday, November 23, 2014

IT'S OFFICIAL

Marion Barry still dead.

Just said the traditional prayer for the dead for Marion Barry

Dómine,Réquiem æternam dona ei, . 
Et lux perpétua lúceat ei. 
Requiéscat in pace. 
Anima ejus, et ánimæ ómnium fidélium defunctórum, per misericórdiam Dei requiéscant in pace. 
Amen.

Thursday, November 20, 2014

THIS FOR ALL THE SINGLE PEOPLE


And it helps if your family thinks you're gay. One of my Facebook friends suggested showing up in a lumberjack shirt: https://www.facebook.com/snipercatcher/posts/10205441302497045?pnref=story

Years ago a neighbour told me there was nothing wrong with me, I would feel better if I did some volunteer work


Mom said I would feel better if I would A) get some exercise B) dust the furniture.

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Saturday, November 15, 2014

Friday, November 14, 2014

I'M SO TIRED

Un-fun dental visit this morning. Some people have WAY too much power.

Thursday, November 13, 2014

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Thursday, November 06, 2014

IT NEVER RAINS

But it pours, literally. Toilet valve blew in the men's room. As I was not there and don't use the men's room anyway I am clear. And I got wet on the way to school, trains backed up something fierce.

Wednesday, November 05, 2014

YESSS!

Republicans took control of the Senate, so now they have the majority in both houses. 

janedoe@seductive.com 

Tuesday, November 04, 2014

IT'S ELECTION DAY

Vote for the candidate who sucks least. Or against the one who sucks most.

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Saturday, October 18, 2014

Friday, October 17, 2014

Thursday, October 16, 2014

Some Vacation

Drove Aunt Irene to the urgent care center.

Sunday, October 12, 2014

Take your pick:

Networks are leading with Ebola and the Redskins lost.

Friday, October 10, 2014

Thursday, October 09, 2014

Sunday, October 05, 2014

Jane walks into a bar...

and finds the bartender drunk and in tears about how bad her life is. Shouldn't it be reversed?

Saturday, October 04, 2014

IT'S YOM KIPPUR

I hope all our names are sealed in the book of life.

Friday, October 03, 2014

Third Banana

Sounds more depressing than second banana.

Wednesday, October 01, 2014

The bad news is...

I will probably have to sell the condo. The good news is, some units in our building are going for more than half a million.

Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Sunday, September 28, 2014

Friday, September 26, 2014

Hard Labour

I have been told when a woman is in the late stages of pregnancy all she wants to do is get the baby out. And that is how I feel about getting my Excel certification.

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

ST. LINUS


Today is the feast of St. Linus, known far and wide for his holy blanket: http://www.bartleby.com/210/9/231.html

And it would have been Grandma B's 107th birthday. And it is the day Patapsco, Pepino and I buried Pepsi's ashes.


Sunday, September 21, 2014

TWENTY YEARS AGO...

...this month one of the funniest shows ever first aired on NBC. Here is one of my favourite  episodes: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=62zfNz0Uf9I

Saturday, September 20, 2014

One month from now

It will have been two years since the robbery. I thought of that when I walked over the spot.

THIRTY YEARS AGO....

... this month British television came out with a made for TV movie “Threads,” about a year after the US nuclear horror story “The Day After.” The production values in “Threads” are different, but the characters are more likeable than those in “The Day After.” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XwBRcitO1lA

FRODO HAS A COLD

If I catch it, I will kill the little rodent.

Friday, September 19, 2014

Curse of the Spider Woman

Something bit me, probably a tick or a spider and apparently while I was asleep. So now I'm on Keflex.

But nobody gets a lifetime rehearsal

As specks of dust we're universal: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=0xzsY2vkEMM

Emily Saliers

Thursday, September 18, 2014

A woman just called me spooky

Not sure if that's a compliment.

HEY WASHINGTON HOSPITAL CENTER!


I did not ASK to be there. My primary care physician was in Anacostia and Promptcare sent me to you. Neither of you had the good sense to do any bloodwork or put me on an antibiotic, in spite C’s virus, low O2 sats and several indicators of Lyme Disease. But BTW, I thank you for at least one staffer listening to me and sending good wishes.

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

I FEEL LIKE A PING PONG BALL

Being batted back and forth between health care facilities.

Monday, September 15, 2014

JANEY'S NEW BABY

Janey and Patapsco proudly announce their newest family member. His name is Pepino, formerly "Juan" and he is an almost five-month-old white Abby boar adopted from the Fairfax County Animal Shelter. He, his mom and four siblings were surrendered to the Shelter sometime before July 12, date of birth given was April 29th. His official adoption date was July 15 of this year. 

My Ears are Still Fucked Up

And I have a rash.

janedoe@seductive.com

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Thursday, September 11, 2014

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Tuesday, September 09, 2014

THE GOOD NEWS:

Had a chest X-ray, my lungs are clear. The bad news: my ears are still gunked up.

Sunday, September 07, 2014

C REFERRED TO ME AS "ALIVE AND BITCHING."

Kind of like Joan Rivers without the clothes or the accessories.

Friday, September 05, 2014

Thursday, September 04, 2014

Monday, September 01, 2014

LABOUR DAY

And I am observing it by labouring only one hour.

janedoe@seductive.com

Friday, August 29, 2014

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Not sure what to make of it

Dreamt my vet told me she heard some abnormal lung sounds. Not sure if it was in me or the pigs.

Janedoe@seductive.com

I DO BELIEVE IN FAIRIES, I DO, I DO!

Angels, too.


janedoe@seductive.com

Friday, August 22, 2014

Thursday, August 21, 2014

Who needs Direct TV?

Just watched a woman getting busted in front of the Town Tavern.

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Monday, August 11, 2014

Saturday, August 09, 2014

Jane Doe's Tours


Otherwise known as "the Real Drunks of Adams Morgan."

Monday, August 04, 2014

President Obama's Birthday

Except he won't have to work. Or go to school until 9PM. And he can afford to eat better places than I can and they'll be open.

First Day of School


Whoopee. But I like the teacher.