TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE DOESN'T SUCK TOO MUCH DAY 366

A good vet's report, a good tip, co-operative parking and not having to blog like this much longer.

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT OR...DAY 365

More rest and New Year's plans proceeding as planned.

KARDASHIAN #1

Kim Kardashian was the most Googled celebrity of 2008.

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT OR...DAY 364

A surprise visit from E. And at least $25.00 worth of Starbucks gift cards.

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT OR...DAY 363

My home and my car are intact.

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT OR...DAY 362

There was parking at Turtle Beach.

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT OR...DAY 361

A successful return day. And A thinks I'm younger than I am.

janedoe@seductive.com

WEEK 52

From my aunt and uncle: "we wish you a merry christmas & a happy new year. I hope the new year dosen't turn out to be another dud like this year was. If it is I'll never say happy newyear again to any one. I'll say-expect the worst and hope for the best and keep plugging away my friend. That way you will be happy forever no matter what."

Lots of sour faces and web-surfing clerks at the mall. Okay, business is bad, but looking sour won't bring in any more customers.

If you at least act as though you cared, it might attract more business. If the woman at Staples hadn't been so nice and helpful I would never have got the book for Mom bound the way I did. And as it turned out, Staples did a better job than I would have just putting something together and it cost the same or less.

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT OR...DAY 360

"G-d sent his only begotten son to die on the cross to redeem mankind."

Jeff Anderson

And we got the mass thing over with Christmas Eve. And H spent Christmas elsewhere.

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE...DAY 359

No one called from Wachovia while we were at mass. And the emergency vehicle out front wasn't for any of us.

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE...DAY 358

I got the computer to work at Mom's. And there was a 66-inch watermain break in Bethesda but as far as i know we still have water.

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE...DAY 357

Made it to Tampa OK.

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE...DAY 356

G brought me a TV dinner.

JANE DOE'S VIDEO PARTY!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tufasbFqqs&feature=channel_page

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2FESq84cwec&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LbCs53u1Xos

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EnXuBbiHoIw

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7iY4Tom6-wM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hDF8cvxfFmE

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vrd9p47MPHg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZUgr1zh878&feature=channel_page

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ovKG0EX52IU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Y_IDAhhRvU&feature=related

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE...DAY 355

I got ten dollars off an entertainment coupon book. And G and J both say the NPC will be happy to have me.

WEEK 51

Man, only one week left in this precious year. Some reflections, enumerated:

1) Things are definitely better than they were one year ago, other than my beloved Pippin being dead and being royally screwed over at one of my jobs. Me, that is, not Pippin.

2) This week I met people going through apparently horrible divorces, dealing with stage three cancer and other things they won’t mention. Yet they acted so upbeat on the first meeting one would never have thought it. Maybe Dennis Prager is right – inflicting your misery on other people is as offensive as inflicting body odour on them – you should act happy even if you don’t feel happy and you should bathe even if you don’t clean. Hmmm, maybe if you act happy you will BE happy.

3) A kind of Zen thing: last night I went to a party, earned more money than expected and had a nice time. Minutes later in the parking garage I knocked the sideview mirror off my car, which will probably take all the money earned at the party to repair. Yet I am trying not to let it get me down. On the way to the party I saw what looked like an accident or a violent crime scene or something. So maybe if I hadn’t been to the party something worse would have happened to me. And having been to that party may have positive ramifications, too.

4) After knocking the mirror off my car things went downhill. Then they went uphill, or at least didn’t continue to go downhill. I guess they kinda coasted.

5) Maybe imagined slights are really imagined. Just because people question me doesn’t mean they think I’m wrong. Or worse yet, don’t like me.

6) Sometimes to make things happen you have to be proactive. Other times non-active.

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE...DAY 354

Got this e-mail from a fellow Youtuber:

''baallllss toooo'' (One of the best lines in Clerks II).

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE...DAY 353

Seventy-five dollars extra.

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE...DAY 352

Sent out my last generic winter holiday cards.

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE... DAY 351

I missed the "wintery mix" on the way to work.

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE...DAY 350

We had a nice office party. And Baby Perpetua is now fully insured.

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE...DAY 349

Got a break from work.

SUNDAY PAPER

Click here for the Memphis Daily News.

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE DOESN'T SUCK TOO MUCH DAY 348

I found my watch. A said he would pray. It restores my faith in the power of prayer, as mine haven't been answered recently. Or at least the answer is usually "no."

CAROLING FOR CATS!

The Animal Welfare League of Alexandria says:

You're invited to our Caroling for Cats Holiday parties as we stay open until midnight on three special Saturdays to help our homeless cats find homes just in time for the holidays! On December 6, December 13, and December 20 we'll be here from noon until midnight -- join us for caroling, refreshments, and fun activities for the whole family!

See: http://alexandriaanimals.org/~awla/special_events.cfm

Also, the shelter is accepting unopened bags of pet food to help animals in need.

(My late beloved Pippin and "baby" Pandora are also included in the 2009 Pets of Alexandria Calendar, available at the shelter)

WEEK 50

Well, I guess it’s been a week of having versus having not, the glass being half-full vs half-empty, getting what you want vs wanting what you’ve got...

I guess also about taking people and things for granted – people and things you’d always thought would be there. And not appreciating them until they’ve been taken away or have become significantly less. Things like the Starbucks gift cards I got last year from my boss and my landlord. And Christmas parties. At one of my jobs we probably won’t have a party and if we do I probably won’t be invited. At another job most of our parties have been great (I didn’t go to last year’s) but this year it will be potluck in the break room.

What sane boss thinks his/her employees actually have time time/money to bring a fucking covered dish this year? At least at my third job the boss realized potlucks are cruel and unusual punishment to people with multiple jobs/children /limited funds or all of the above.

Honestly I have been dragging my heels on the potluck thing not as much as a matter of time/money/energy resources, but as of nursing hurt feelings, read “grudges.” My thinking: “with some of the hurtful things you’ve said/done why should I be expected to show up, let alone bring food? Let the favoured ones bring a covered dish – they can afford it more than I can.” But then I figured what kind of Christian am I if I can’t bury the hatchet for Jesus’ birthday?

And it is also a matter of coveting my neighbour’s spouse, goods etc. I was doing reasonably well this morning until I found out the friend of a friend who is younger than I am is getting married. My thought was “why them, not me?” Why haven’t I caught the fucking brass ring yet? Several hours later I put on my car radio and hear a younger guy who worked at the same place as me now working as a network anchor. Ouch!

Again self-pity kicks in “why did I diet myself into anorexia, glop makeup on my face, work 12 to 20 hours on end to end up single, broke and underemployed?” Sure, I’m not a quadriplegic and I don’t live in Haiti or Malawi, but I wouldn’t mind a little more money. Or air time…

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE DOESN'T SUCK TOO MUCH DAY 347

Three cheques in the mail. Not three kings or three ships, but certainly welcome.

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE DOESN'T SUCK TOO MUCH DAY 346

I have all my front teeth. And enough self-control not to kill anyone.

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE DOESN'T SUCK TOO MUCH DAY 345

The guys at Starbucks and Shoppers let me in front of them in line and B. carried my chair for me.

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE DOESN'T SUCK TOO MUCH DAY 344

Plenty of parking and a free ice tea from Starbucks.

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE DOESN'T SUCK TOO MUCH DAY 343

Three parties next week.

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE DOESN'T SUCK TOO MUCH DAY 342

A nice time at the Fulbright party.

SUNDAY PAPER

Click here for the Oklahoma Gazette.

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE DOESN'T SUCK TOO MUCH DAY 341

The lady at Giant was honest with me and I got some return address labels from CDA.

WEEK 49

More doctor's appointments. A year ago it was Pippin, but why should he have all the fun? As Joni Mitchell said, "you don't realize what you've got until it's gone." How true. While we've established I don't have cancer (come on, look at me, do I look like someone who's wasting away?) the issue of my having, or not having children came up. Until now, it wasn't that I couldn't have them or didn't want to, I just happened not to have any. Part of this comes from the saying that the greatest thing a father could do for his children was to love their mother. I think it goes conversely -- it is a great thing for children to see their mother love their father. As I think a husband should be more than a sperm donor and a meal ticket, I never got married, being that the only men who would have married me would have been little more than that.

And so, I'm assured the chosen course of treatment won't prevent me from having children, even though the clock is ticking big time. So we are safe for a while.

I guess another issue this week is taking people and things for granted. While the economy was reasonably good, the main source of my income was massage and public relations, both of which, like it or not, are seen as forms of prostitution. Now those have both dried up pretty much and I would be happy for the money no matter how emotionally unfulfilling I find both fields of work. I saw some internet article that said you have to love, or at least believe in what you're doing to have a fulfilling career. Unfortunately that's not how I feel about massage.

Today the shoe was on the other foot. My doctor had a student from Georgetown in his office. It was interesting to have someone else be the third person in the room, to be the one to sit there and shut up and offer to make photocopies. She was nice and asked all the right questions. I hope she gets a good grade.

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE DOESN'T SUCK TOO MUCH DAY 340


My mom and I are doing better than a lot of my doctor's other patients.

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE DOESN'T SUCK TOO MUCH DAY 339

A $25.00 tip. And a good parking space. And...

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE DOESN'T SUCK TOO MUCH DAY 338

I don't have cancer. And I sealed my plans for New Year's Eve.

janedoe@seductive.com

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE DOESN'T SUCK TOO MUCH DAY 337

My TV is ready for February 17th, which coincidentally would have been my father's 85th birthday.

TRYING NOT TO BE TOO UNHAPPY ABOUT IT, OR MY LIFE DOESN'T SUCK TOO MUCH DAY 336

We got paid

janedoe@seductive.com