Tuesday, September 30, 2003

HALLOWEEN #1

Halloween is # 1 of the Lycos 50 for the week ending 9/27. Not sure whether they're referring to the holiday or the movie.

Monday, September 29, 2003

A RABBI SPEAKS OUT

It's nice to be defended once in a while.
THE FIREBIRD. NO, NOT THE MOZILLA OR PONTIAC OR STRAVINSKY VERSION

Today's card is the hanged man. In the Russian Tarot of St. Petersburg, the hanged man is depicted hanging from an apple tree. The firebird is eating the apples.

Sunday, September 28, 2003

EVIL MANGUS

Mangus is more evil than I am. Some asshole called him on the phone trying to sell him lightbulbs, and Mangus said, "I'm blind. I don't need lightbulbs." The asshole was embarrassed and said "Oh, I'm sorry," and Mangus said "you should be."

Saturday, September 27, 2003

THIS IS HOW I FEEL

The end of Friends.
GEOGHAN

Some interesting observations on John Geoghan.
ISABEL #1

Hurricane Isabel was # 1 of the Lycos 50. I am so out of it, it was just last night that I realized I had forgotten to update. Slept through the alarm this morning.

Friday, September 26, 2003

L'SHANAH TOVAH!

Happy New Year 5764. For those of you reading this after sunset, shame on you.

Thursday, September 25, 2003

FRIENDS: THE FINAL SEASON

This was it -- the first night of the final season. Yikes! I realize it's just a TV show, but I have not been this into a show since ThirtySomething or The X-Files. Of course, the X-Files had let itself peter out, kind of like Happy Days or The Waltons, so it was just kind of like watching someone die slowly.

Tonight, for those of you on the west coast, Ross and Charlie admitted their feelings for each other, as did Rachel and Joey. Mike admitted to Phoebe he had been dating Precious, whom he dumped that night, causing her to declare it was her worst birthday ever. I still think my worst birthday ever was the one spent first in the emergency room, then at a funeral. Gee, dating someone when you're really in love with someone else. I never did that.
SOUTHERN COMFORT

Heard a good feature on Morning Edition on Moon Pies. Have not been blogging much lately--either out of town or not feeling well.

Wednesday, September 24, 2003

QUEEN FOR A DAY

Just finished watching Performing As. Some guy from New York was performing as Freddie Mercury. He almost had the swish down right.

janedoe@seductive.com

Tuesday, September 23, 2003

SWEET HOME PENNSYLVANIA

Just got home from visiting the relatives. As Tennessee Williams said, "time is the greatest distance between two places."

Monday, September 22, 2003

OUT OF THE POCKET

I am leaving town for my grandmother's 96th birthday -- about 50 miles from Shenksville and the Quecreek Mine. If you hear anything about mayhem in western Pennsylvania, Osama Bin Laden and the Quecreek Mining Company had nothing to do with it.

Sunday, September 21, 2003

A DISTURBING DREAM

I had a rather disturbing yet strangely pleasant dream yesterday afternoon. (I don't sleep much at night.) I dreamt my first love, who turned out to be gay, married a woman. When I found out he was gay, almost three years ago, I was elated. It meant I wasn't as unattractive or unpleasant as people tell me I am -- there was nothing wrong with me, all I needed to do was grow a penis.

In the dream, I was happy. I was not angry or resentful of his bride, even though ultimately he DID choose another woman over me. Instead, I was happy for them both and was more concerned about the beautiful dress I had chosen for the wedding.

Does this mean I am making progress?
WHAT IS WITH THESE MEN?

And why do they not respect the fact that the bulk of my work is at night, on weekends/holidays? One of the most tiresome questions I get, ranking right up there with "so, what does a producer do?" is "what do you do in your spare time?" or "what do you do for fun?" If I had any spare time, I would not resort to personals ads or internet dating, and "fun" can be lots of things in the city, or nearby suburbs, but usually does not involve visits to Home Depot, Best Buy or Behnke's. I bought a condo in Adams-Morgan so I could enjoy the neighborhood, not spend my weekends in Greenbelt or Gaithersburg or Centreville.

Why do people not understand that not everyone works nine to five Monday through Friday? If I am willing to meet you on a Sunday afternoon after two hours of sleep for coffee or drinks (forget dinner), why can't you show some understanding and try to accomodate my schedule? If I were a doctor, or a cop or worked for some bigshot politician would you grouse about it? I could be working in some stupid nine-to-five PR job earning more money, but that is not the job I have chosen for myself. If I were a man, would you accept this? There have been men for whom I would have given everything up, pulled up stakes and taken some stupid $5.00 job for, but there were only two of them, and one of them married another woman anyway.

Saturday, September 20, 2003

ASSHOLES WITH BADGES

"Nothing more scary than an asshole with a badge."

Ken Hunter

Friday, September 19, 2003

NINE DEAD IN VIRGINIA

When I last heard, the total death toll was up to 23. At least one million without power, one million without water, 300 trees down in the District alone. Water is up over the Annapolis city docks -- my girlfriend's mother says she has never seen the tide so high in their neighborhood.

Thursday, September 18, 2003

EVERYONE SHOULD HAVE SUCH PROBLEMS

How Ben and Jen are going to split their assetts.
BUTTERCUP!

Heard this song on my way to work this morning:

Why do you build me up (build me up) Buttercup, baby
Just to let me down (let me down)and mess me around
And then worst of all (worst of all) you never call, baby
When you say you will (say you will) but I love you still
I need you (I need you) more than anyone, darlin'
You know that I have from the start
So build me up (build me up) Buttercup, don't break my heart

"I'll be over at ten", you told me time and again
But you're late, I wait around and then (bah-dah-dah)
I run to the door, I can't take any more
It's not you, you let me down again

(Hey, hey, hey!) Baby, baby, try to find
(Hey, hey, hey!) A little time, and I'll make you happy
(Hey, hey, hey!) I'll be home
I'll be beside the phone waiting for you
Ooo-oo-ooo, ooo-oo-ooo

Why do you build me up (build me up) Buttercup, baby
Just to let me down (let me down) and mess me around
And then worst of all (worst of all) you never call, baby
When you say you will (say you will) but I love you still
I need you (I need you) more than anyone, darlin'
You know that I have from the start
So build me up (build me up) Buttercup, don't break my heart

You were my toy but I could be the boy you adore
If you'd just let me know (bah-dah-dah)
Although you're untrue, I'm attracted to you all the more
Why do I need you so

(Hey, hey, hey!) Baby, baby, try to find
(Hey, hey, hey!) A little time and I'll make you happy
(Hey, hey, hey!) I'll be home
I'll be beside the phone waiting for you
Ooo-oo-ooo, ooo-oo-ooo

Why do you build me up (build me up) Buttercup, baby
Just to let me down (let me down) and mess me around
And then worst of all (worst of all) you never call, baby
When you say you will (say you will) but I love you still
I need you (I need you) more than anyone, darlin'
You know that I have from the start
So build me up (build me up) Buttercup, don't break my heart

I-I-I need you-oo-oo more than anyone, baby
You know that I have from the start
So build me up (build me up) Buttercup, don't break my heart
{fade}

Build Me Up, Buttercup by the Foundations

Wednesday, September 17, 2003

HOW DEPRESSING

MSN's Love Over 40. At least there are more of us.
THE CALM BEFORE THE STORM

"I'm just waiting for the hurricane."

Chris DeBurgh

Tuesday, September 16, 2003

KAZAA # 1 AGAIN

KaZaA is #1 in the latest Lycos 50.

Monday, September 15, 2003

THE MOOSE IS LOOSE

Or at least his book is, and not doing terribly well. Former MoCo Police Chief Charles Moose's book hit the stores today, talking about how he caught the snipers last year. Moose didn't -- they had to go to Frederick to be caught. Wonder whether Moose mentions Charlie Warren, and how he helped catch the snipers.
TRYING TO REASON WITH HURRICANE SEASON

Everyone from South Carolina to Lawn Guy Land is gearing up for Hurricane Isabel. People are raiding hardware stores and buying batteries and canned goods. About six months ago they were buying duct tape.

Sunday, September 14, 2003

MY LOVE LIVE IMPROVES!

People, or as my friend, Robert, calls it Poople, magazine, reports Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez have split up. Does this mean Ben is available? And what about Tobey Maguire?

THE EX FILES

Match Dot Com tells the five biggest online mistakes people make. I agree with some of them. Lurn too spellan punkshewate! Take a typing course if necessary! AND DON'T TYPE IN ALL CAPS. I AM NOT BLIND! Get photoshop! Don't post pictures of yourself with a mysterious arm or hand around you. It implies you may have feelings for the person who owns the arm or hand. And don't post pictures of yourself with a someone of the opposite sex unless that person is your mother, sister or grandmother. Also, lose the kids. This does not imply you are warm and fuzzy -- to me it means "well, there go any quiet weekends together," also "that's money that's going towards orthodontia, ballet lessons, college etc. Forget about getting expensive birthday or Christmas presents unless he's Bill Gates."

Also, smile, dammit! Don't look as though you had something stuck up your ass! I have seen ads for some guys who may have been cute, but whose ads I was hard-pressed to respond to because of their miserable aspects.

One item I DO have problems with is the "ex files." The article says refrain from mentioning your ex -- you may come across as bitter or still attached to the ex. Right now I am e-mailing a guy who keeps pressing me on whether I am a "country girl" or a "city girl." He actually likes the idea of living in a country cottage. This is frighteningly reminiscent of a guy I dated years ago, who looked as though he he belonged on the Munsters or the Addams Family. This image conjures up visions of more Saturday afternoons spent at Home Depot or Best Buy, followed by dinner at home and an evening of watching the History Channel.

Not only that, I find the word "girl" insulting. How would he like it if I called him "boy?"

Saturday, September 13, 2003

HOT WHEELS

The Animal League of Alexandria, from whence cometh my beloved Thunder, is hosting a Hot Wheels show Sunday from noon to 4. Proceeds benefit the shelter, kids get a free car.
DUTCH CAT SITE

Aunt Ellen says "Dutch Kitties know how to purr, too!"

Friday, September 12, 2003

HE'S WALKED THE LINE FOR THE LAST TIME

Johnny Cash died today. I first remember hearing when I was about two or three. It was in my Aunt Irene's little yellow house in Georgetown. She had one of those big old hi-fi's that was about as long as some cars. It was her first piece of furniture. I remember being fascinated by his deep voice and terrified by anything that burns.

George's sister is terrified of fire, and of all people, they had her light the unity candle when George and Hope got married.
HE'S COMPANY

John Ritter died this morning while I was running the board. If you heard it first on Mix 107 you have me to thank me for it -- I was the one who told Spanky, who hadn't heard it before. Sorry to toot my own horn, but I get so few opportunities to do it....

Ironically, he was one of the characters in Tadpole, the last DVD I rented. I didn't recognize him with the beard and the glasses and the extra weight, which may have been a contributing factor to his death of a heart attack. My doctor
was on Channel Five talking about it. I seem to have a knack for picking timely videos. The video I rented immediately before September 11th, 2001 was Children of the Revolution.

I remember Ritter most from Three's Company. Some critic referred to him as "refreshingly un-macho." Back in the 70's, Three's Company was considered really risque, even though none of the three roommates had sex with each other. Then during the '80's I had a boyfriend with friend's in a Three's Company -type situation. Then during the '90's I found myself in a similar situation.


THE DAY AFTER

Did not blog at all yesterday -- still trying to forget what happened two years ago. The weather yesterday was eerily similar to that on September 11, 2001. One of my exes re-married on September 11, 1999. It was also Rosh Hashanah. He sure knows how to pick 'em (wives and wedding dates)

Thursday, September 11, 2003

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Wednesday, September 10, 2003

FROM MY PARENTS' PARISH BULLETIN

On the eve of September 11th: Heavenly Lullabies

Tuesday, September 09, 2003

MY SECOND REJECTION LETTER!

Got a form rejection letter from Addicus Books . Editorial assistant Jack Kusler writes "This is not a negative assessment of your work." If rejecting my book is not negative, what is?
BABY ONE MORE TIME

Britney Spears is #1 of the Lycos 50 again.

janedoe@seductive.com

IT'S GONNA BE A BLOCKBUSTER EVENING

Got a freebie coupon, so I rented Deconstructing Harry and Tadpole. Woody Allen and Tobey Maguire. What more could I aske for -- comedy, neuroses and sex with a younger man?
HUGH GRANT 43

Hugh Grant is 43 today, so I do not lust only after younger men.

Monday, September 08, 2003

THE LOVE SONG OF J. ELLEN HAUTANEN?


"S’io credesse che mia risposta fosse
A persona che mai tornasse al mondo,
Questa fiamma staria senza piu scosse.
Ma perciocche giammai di questo fondo
Non torno vivo alcun, s’i’odo il vero,
Senza tema d’infamia ti rispondo."

From The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock by T.S. Eliot


Sunday, September 07, 2003

GOOD RIDDANCE

Bubble by bubble
You're dragging me down.
While I'm trying to swim
You are trying to drown.
ONLY IN CALIFORNIA

The Rat Fan Club. Also, someone rescued 350 pigs.

Saturday, September 06, 2003

A WIDOW FOR ONE YEAR

"Hannah turned toward the house to find her room, to take a shower or a bath, to soak herself in her freshest memory of what love looked like -- just in case it night one day happen to her.
It wouldn't happen, Hannah knew."

from A Widow for One Year, by John Irving

Finished reading it this morning. I swear, Irving wrote my book -- Munich, Freising, Long Island, the older woman with the younger man, the former lover's house, the dildos, the best friend's father. At the beginning of the book, Marion is a little younger than I am -- at the end, Hannah and Ruth are the same age. Unlike Hannah, I know how it feels to be in love, but will I be 53 or 76 when my great love returns? If ever?

Friday, September 05, 2003

WOW

Saw a segment on Channel 5 about a woman with herpes. She weighed about 400 lbs. Wow, what a combination. And she was actually married.

Thursday, September 04, 2003

WHO'LL STOP THE RAIN?

It seems as though it has been raining forever now, even though it's just been a couple days. It's damp, it's humid, my condo stinks, even though I have the A/C on constantly. There has not been a mold count for the last couple days, but my head aches and I have trouble breathing. It feels like Florida, but with less sun, or like England without the quaintness. Like Annie, they SAY the sun'll come out tomorrow.

Wednesday, September 03, 2003

I ONLY WANT TO BE WITH YOU

"I don't know what it is that makes me love you so

I only know I never wanna let you go.
'Cause you started something
oh
can't you see
That ever since we met you've had a hold on me.
It happens to be true: I only wanna be with you.

It doesn't matter where you go and what you do

I wanna spend each moment of the day with you.
Oh
look what has happened with just one kiss

I never knew that I could be in love like this.
It's crazy but it's true: I only wanna be with you.

You stopped and smiled at me
asked if I'd care to dance

I fell into your open arms and I didn't stand a chance.
Now listen
honey
I just wanna be beside you everywhere

As long as we're together
honey
I don't care.
'Cause you started something
oh
can't you see
That ever since we met you've had a hold on me.
No matter what you do: I only wanna be with you.

You stopped and smiled at me
asked if I'd care to dance
...
No matter what you do: I only
I only
I only wanna be with you!"

Dusty Springfield, 1964

Yeah, I don't know why I felt/feel this way about some guys -- don't know what it was, or why they had a hold on me....

OOPS, SHE DID IT AGAIN

Britney Spears is #1 of the Lycos 50 for the week ending September 30th.
PAUL HILL

Paul Hill, the guy convicted of killing the abortionist, is scheduled to die soon. He says he will go to Heaven for his deeds. Again, may God have mercy on us all.

janedoe@seductive.com

MEN ARE PIGS

The author of "Men are Pigs, but We Love Bacon," will be speaking at Lamba Rising tomorrow. No insult intended to my darling pigs, of course.

Tuesday, September 02, 2003

SOMETHING TO BLOG ABOUT AFTER ALL

Got my first rejection letter today, from North Point Books. I am comforted to know Alexandra Fuller tried to write about eight books before she published Don't Let's Go to the Dogs Tonight.
NO TOP 50 TODAY

Oh, no. there is no Lycos Top 50 today, so I guess you will have to wait until tomorrow -- I can't think of anything.

Monday, September 01, 2003

LABOR DAY

CNN reports Americans are the most productive people in the world and one in three works more than 40 hours per week. Duh! I am observing the day by NOT laboring.